Will Bueché

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How to explain Tardy the Turtle's absence

Posted in Personal by Will on Wednesday, February 22nd, 2006 ~ 7pm

If writer/director/puppeteer Dan Milano secures permission from Fox to have Tardy the Turtle appear on the Independent Film Channel version of Greg the Bunny, here’s my take on how to explain why Tardy has being missing for the past couple years.

At some point, Tardy was being babysat (turtle-sat?) and there was a mix-up involving pork that left Tardy with the mistaken impression that he was Jewish. Maybe the babbysitter told him he wasn’t allowed to eat her pork fried rice (since he tends to get food all over the place), or maybe a ham sandwich was taken away from him because the bread was moldy.

Somehow Tardy was left with the impression that not eating pork was a matter of faith. Building on this tiny bit of info, Tardy concludes that he must be Jewish. Informed by this revelation, Tardy set out on the traditional mitzvah many American Jews undertake of moving to Israel for a few years, to better appreciate “his” culture.

When we meet up again with Tardy, his beliefs haven’t matured much beyond the “no-pork” rule, but he’s as sweet as ever and has liked everyone he’s met.

Anyway that’s my idea, free for the taking.

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