Synopsis: An immature boy FBI agent gets transfered to the part of the FBI where the freaky-freaks live and fight crime, cheif amongst them Hellboy himself, a red skinned behemoth spawned in hell but raised in the USA. The immature FBI agent attempts to flirt with Hellboy’s ex-girlfriend, and Hellboy fights a bunch of lizard-dogs. The end.
The synopsis should convey my impression of the depth of this film, so I’ll skip the formal review and I’ll just say you can chalk this one up as $20 wasted. I paid $20 because I wanted to see the director’s cut, not the theatrical short version that is for rent. So be assured that when I dismiss this film as a superficial treatment of what might or might not be a superficial comic series (can’t tell from this film), I’m dismissing the definitive cut of the film.
The immature FBI agent is what bothers me most about this film. This film does a disservice to the genre of comic book films by making absolutely clear that the comic book views of male/female relationships are often incredibly uninformed, if not outright imaginary. Just because a female character EXISTS doesn’t mean she’d put up with his flirtations, EVEN IF, as in the case here, she’d been in a mental ward for a long time. And didn’t it occur to him that it wouldn’t be wise to date a co-worker, particularly when her ex is an eight foot tall walking brick wall? The completely unrealistic attempts at writing relationships for these characters makes the film fail, and fail hard. That, and too many lizard dogs.